When You Don’t Live Nearby: Tips for Long-Distance Caregivers

As aging parents grow older, their need for assistance can increase. Mobility can change, making home navigation and performing activities of daily living difficult, driving can become more challenging, and forgetfulness can have serious consequences. Based on life changes for their aging parents, many adult children choose to become caregivers when this happens. But what if you’re a long-distance caregiver? This can make caregiving difficult and feel nearly impossible, you may even feel alone in this endeavor. But you’re not. According to statistics provided by the Family Caregiver Alliance, “Approximately 5-7 million caregivers in the U.S. (about 15% of all caregivers) are long-distance caregivers. This number is projected to double by 2020.” Caregiving from afar poses a unique challenge, but the following tips can help ease the stress.

Recruit a Team

Caregivers truly are superheroes, but it just isn’t realistic to think you can care for your loved one all by yourself. Just like it takes a village to raise a child, it also takes a village to provide adequate care to a senior loved one. To begin building your team, start by recruiting the help of trusted and committed family members and friends. If you wish, designate yourself as the team leader and assign everyone a particular task that plays to their strengths. A program like Rallyhood can help you manage everyone involved in your loved one’s care, no matter how far apart you are.

You might also consider adding a geriatric care manager to the team, especially as your loved one’s needs increase. A geriatric care manager is essentially your go-to liaison as far as all things caregiving-related, as they can help with anything from monitoring finances and arranging quality in-home care to assessing care and creating a solid plan of action.

Stay Informed About Medical Needs

While you may be able to travel back home for major appointments, it likely isn’t going to happen for every single doctor’s visit. Fortunately, technology has made long-distance caregiving a lot easier with the advent of caregiving apps that connect you with the touch of a button. Not only can you connect your entire support team, but the medical liaison can update everyone via the app or video call you during the appointment, so you can take your own notes and ask questions.

If your loved one lives alone, you might also consider adding an activity and location tracker and medical alert system to your arsenal of long-distance caregiving tools. These can help you keep an eye on the amount of exercise they get, where they are, and if they need immediate attention respectively.

When it comes to your loved one’s health insurance, keep in mind that Medicare covers many routine medical checkups, including prescription, dental, and eye, so it is important that you stay informed regarding any changes that could potentially impact their coverage. Your loved one may not be tech-savvy, but you are, so use the internet to access helpful resources to guide you to find the best plans and to assist with the enrollment process.

Keep Communication Open

While it is your job to take care of your aging loved one, no one knows what they need better than they do. Sometimes providing help is as simple as just asking what their needs are, such as:

• Do you feel safe in your home?
• Are you able to maneuver about easily?
• Are there any particular tasks that have become difficult?
• What would make life easier?
• How are you doing?

   

  The easiest way to always keep in touch and to stay abreast of how they’re doing is through constant and regular communication, through calls, emails and texting. Not only does this help you keep a sharp eye on their state of mind and health, but it provides your loved one with a healthy dose of much-needed attention. Of course, your senior may need to become better acquainted with mobile tech, or perhaps with all your communication, they need a better phone. If the device is an issue, spring for a new iPhone 11, or look to a Samsung Galaxy 9, which has a larger battery and even comes with a stylus. What’s more, you can easily find a provider who offers senior discounts for plans with unlimited talk, text and data.

  Of course, while a phone call is a convenient way to check in, a video call will enable you to watch for warning signs that extra help is needed. For example, weight loss could mean difficulty eating or preparing food while a disheveled appearance could signify issues with bathing or grooming. Perhaps you might notice a bruise from a fall or catch sight of a pile of dishes and laundry in the background because household chores take too much of their energy. Any of these signs could mean it’s time to look into in-home care, such as assistance with bathing, dressing, cooking, groceries, transportation, medication, or even companionship.

  The key to being a good long-distance caregiver is constantly re-evaluating the care plan and making changes as necessary. Start things off by putting a team together, and stay engaged with the process throughout their time of need. Be sure to stay on top of medical care, and communicate with your loved one and support team often to ensure your loved one gets the care they need and deserve.